Once upon a time not very long back a young lady had walked into our lives. We stayed in Punjabi bagh that time. Navya was barely 9 months. I was struggling with housework, the baby and an upcoming move to Gurgaon. At this busy phase in life, she joined my house as domestic help and made our lives as easy as any human can. She was a cook, she was a cleaner, she was a baby sitter, she was the care giver, she was everything one household needs. She cooked yummy food for us, she looked after my daughter, she kept the whole place clean. There was nothing that this lady couldn't do. A lot of work and more work is what she did all through the day.
She was a great cook, she taught me how to make lachcha paranthas. She looked after Navya so well that sometimes people joked that my daughter was happier with her than me. She worked around the clock and never complained. But on some bad days, she only mused about how she was still single at 25 year old. I always humored her to forget getting married and enjoy her freedom. But she always said she wished to get married.
One day we all went to Udaipur and left her behind in the house. She was supposed to look after the house. She did keep the house up and about and safe those 3 days. When we came back, we realised she was in love with our driver. This wasn't going to be one of those cheap romances that dwell between domestic helps. We thought they would give up. They didn't. We moved to Gurgaon. Our driver and the domestic help also moved, still in love.
Once in Gurgaon, they decided to get married. We had no qualms as long as they both worked for us. They went to their village, got married and came back. She was even more efficient now. Getting married was one of her prime wishes and since that was fulfilled so she looked to life with a lot of hope. Soon she came to know that she was pregnant. She still continued to work with equal diligence. She worked with us for another six months after which she said she needed a break. We let her go with a heavy heart. Not because we would be short of help but because we would miss her. My daughter would miss her like crazy. When she left, Navya was a babbling baby who was learning to talk. My domestic help always told her to call her 'Didi' but Navya struggled with it. Ironically, a week after she left, Navya started saying 'Didi'.
3 months later, she called to say that she had had a baby boy and they were both healthy. We settled into our new house and she promised us that once her baby was one year old she would come back to work with us. We were keen on that arrangement since she was a hard worker. Another few months passed by and we forgot about her promise.
Then one day we decided to call the number that belonged to her brother to check on when she planned to be in the city. She always said she was a city girl and couldn't stay in her village for too long. So we thought let's enquire if she wants to come back and work with us. Her brother answered the phone and cried and told my mother in law that 'Meena' had died. She had used her dupatta to hang herself after a fight with her husband. She had died in a fit of rage and left her child behind.
None of us could digest this news. It was like a rude shock which jolted us. Yes, we had forgotten about her in our mundane lives but that didn't mean we didn't care. Apparently she had some differences with her husband(our driver) from the beginning which led to this impulse decision.
It took me many days to take down this bad piece of news. That female had spent almost 2 years in my house and had helped in every which way possible. The only way we had helped her was giving her a platform where she fell in love with the guy she married which eventually led to her demise. This didn't add up to much help at all actually. So how much of it was my fault, I thought. I had hired her. I had got her in my house. I had left her alone in the house to go to Udaipur. I had allowed her to follow her affair with my driver. I had let her marry that man. Thus, in a way I had made her life miserable enough to die. I am left confused with these thoughts. It has created so much fuss in my mind that after 6 months of her death I have finally reconciled to the fact that I didn't create a situation which led to her death. I created a situation which let her live her entire lifetime in those 2 years. She got married which was her main wish and even became a mother.
I don't know if I am saying this to let the guilt scrape off me or being positive is the way to go here. I am clueless. And this confusion is what has stopped me from writing about her for these 6 months. For some who read this, it might look trivial to share an experience of a mere domestic help on my blog. But only those whose lives she touched would understand what I mean.
R.I.P Meena. I always think of you when me make lachcha paranthas at home.
She was a great cook, she taught me how to make lachcha paranthas. She looked after Navya so well that sometimes people joked that my daughter was happier with her than me. She worked around the clock and never complained. But on some bad days, she only mused about how she was still single at 25 year old. I always humored her to forget getting married and enjoy her freedom. But she always said she wished to get married.
One day we all went to Udaipur and left her behind in the house. She was supposed to look after the house. She did keep the house up and about and safe those 3 days. When we came back, we realised she was in love with our driver. This wasn't going to be one of those cheap romances that dwell between domestic helps. We thought they would give up. They didn't. We moved to Gurgaon. Our driver and the domestic help also moved, still in love.
Once in Gurgaon, they decided to get married. We had no qualms as long as they both worked for us. They went to their village, got married and came back. She was even more efficient now. Getting married was one of her prime wishes and since that was fulfilled so she looked to life with a lot of hope. Soon she came to know that she was pregnant. She still continued to work with equal diligence. She worked with us for another six months after which she said she needed a break. We let her go with a heavy heart. Not because we would be short of help but because we would miss her. My daughter would miss her like crazy. When she left, Navya was a babbling baby who was learning to talk. My domestic help always told her to call her 'Didi' but Navya struggled with it. Ironically, a week after she left, Navya started saying 'Didi'.
3 months later, she called to say that she had had a baby boy and they were both healthy. We settled into our new house and she promised us that once her baby was one year old she would come back to work with us. We were keen on that arrangement since she was a hard worker. Another few months passed by and we forgot about her promise.
Then one day we decided to call the number that belonged to her brother to check on when she planned to be in the city. She always said she was a city girl and couldn't stay in her village for too long. So we thought let's enquire if she wants to come back and work with us. Her brother answered the phone and cried and told my mother in law that 'Meena' had died. She had used her dupatta to hang herself after a fight with her husband. She had died in a fit of rage and left her child behind.
None of us could digest this news. It was like a rude shock which jolted us. Yes, we had forgotten about her in our mundane lives but that didn't mean we didn't care. Apparently she had some differences with her husband(our driver) from the beginning which led to this impulse decision.
It took me many days to take down this bad piece of news. That female had spent almost 2 years in my house and had helped in every which way possible. The only way we had helped her was giving her a platform where she fell in love with the guy she married which eventually led to her demise. This didn't add up to much help at all actually. So how much of it was my fault, I thought. I had hired her. I had got her in my house. I had left her alone in the house to go to Udaipur. I had allowed her to follow her affair with my driver. I had let her marry that man. Thus, in a way I had made her life miserable enough to die. I am left confused with these thoughts. It has created so much fuss in my mind that after 6 months of her death I have finally reconciled to the fact that I didn't create a situation which led to her death. I created a situation which let her live her entire lifetime in those 2 years. She got married which was her main wish and even became a mother.
I don't know if I am saying this to let the guilt scrape off me or being positive is the way to go here. I am clueless. And this confusion is what has stopped me from writing about her for these 6 months. For some who read this, it might look trivial to share an experience of a mere domestic help on my blog. But only those whose lives she touched would understand what I mean.
R.I.P Meena. I always think of you when me make lachcha paranthas at home.
